It's my burden...

I feel like I have a chronic pain disorder for a reason. Whether it be because I have it over another someone else who couldnt handle it as well or because I need to show strength, grow strength and become even closer to God. I may have this because it's my burden to bear. I believe we all have something, something that holds us back at times, or something we must overcome. Either way, I have P.C. Syndrome and I've had it, that I know of, for over 2 years. The pretty consistent pain has been for 9 or 10 months now. I'm almost sure that a lot of people that know me don't realize how bad my pain is. When I was in labor with my kids, they asked me both times what my pain was on a scale from 1-10. I said 6/7 because I knew it could be worse. Well, my pain is a consistent 8 when it's not a good day. Sitting, standing, walking, moving or even folding laundry hurts... When I'm laying down, it is usually better, along with sitting on a heating pad or having Matt rub my back (but it only feels better while he's rubbing, once he's done the pain is back). I'm not trying to make this sound whiney, or a bigger deal then it is, but I do want others to be aware of how I feel. There are a lot of chronic pain disorders, and although we may not look like something is wrong, it doesn't mean that nothing is. Chronic pain can affect men, women, children, elderly, etc... Some are worse on pain than others, but they all mean that the person with the problem has pain. Although I'm 26, I look healthy and I have a smile on my face 90% of the time at least, it doesn't mean I'm not in pain... God helps me get through my days. Praying, remembering Bible verses, praise and worship songs or reading the Bible help me. My husband helps me as well, when he's here, haha. Being in the Army, especially the infantry, he's working quite a bit. I have friends that help too and my boys are great as well. I do have support, and I know I'll be okay eventually. I have weak moments dealing with this, especially when I've had 6 bad pain days out of the last 7. Tomorrow is a new day and if I still hurt, it's time for a movie/cartoon day with Levi while I sit on a heating pad! God Bless